


The Agent

by MueraRashaye



Category: Doctor Who, James Bond (Movies)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, F/M, Gen, Time Lord Angst, Time Lord James Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-26
Updated: 2013-11-26
Packaged: 2018-01-02 16:56:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1059287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MueraRashaye/pseuds/MueraRashaye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Doctor has an appointment to keep, and for once he's the one on time. What he had hoped would be a lighthearted story-swap became a bit more serious when he stepped out of the TARDIS to see a burnt wreck where his friend's home once was and the damage to his old friend's TARDIS. But at least he hadn't gotten a new regeneration while he was gone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Agent

**Author's Note:**

> My own twist on the fan-concept of James Bond as a Time Lord. Couldn't find any fics with it, so figured it really, really had to be done.

“Where are we going now Doctor?” Amy asked, “Oooh, can we go somewhere with good seafood? I could kill for some shellfish right now.”

“Actually Mrs. Williams, I have an appointment I must keep,” the Doctor replied jauntily, “So we will be going to an old manor in Scotland, afraid there isn’t much seafood there, though there might be some eels in the loch.”

“Eels,” Amy shuddered, “No thank you, Doctor.”

“Just as well, they’re vicious things, as like to kill you as sit on a plate,” he nodded, pushing at buttons and lowering levers in the TARDIS control.

“But Doctor, you’re a Time Lord, can’t you just keep the appointment whenever you want?” Rory asked, coming up behind Amy to wrap an arm around her waist. “Just hop around and all that?”

“Quite, quite, but there are fixed points as you know. Very fixed, very pointy, those fixed points. And personal timelines crossing, all that mixed bag of tricks. Besides, he’s an old friend. And old friend’s appointments deserve prompt replies,” the Doctor beamed at them, “Would a nice bowl of custard serve as a guest-gift?”

“I think you mean hostess gift,” Amy grinned, “And who could say no to a bowl of custard?”

“Oh he would be quite irked to be called a hostess!” he laughed, “And no one of course! Aaaand…. We’re here! Everyone out! Out we go! Over the hills and through the woods-“ he sang as he skipped out the door, twirling his sonic between his fingers. Amy and Rory exchanged amused glances before following at a more placid pace.

As soon as they got out of the TARDIS, they froze, the Doctor halted in front of them and staring at the burnt out shell of a truly grand old home. “What happened here?” Amy gasped, tugging Rory up to stand next to the Doctor with her. “Are you certain we’re at the right time, Doctor?”

“Old girl likes him, she wouldn’t let us be late,” the Doctor said, worried tone belying the confident declaration. “He’s always getting in trouble. _He’s_ the one that’s late, old dog.”

As if his statement had summoned him, a roar of an engine was heard, what must have been a beautiful old Aston Martin rumbling down the dirt road. Amy and Rory winced at the obvious damage that had been done to it – it was a lovely car, but had quite a bit more work to do before it was returned to pristine condition, as it obviously had been once by the shine to the clean parts of the body.

The car skidded to a halt in the traffic circle they had parked in, a tall blonde man stepping out before the car had even completely halted and striding towards the Doctor confidently, a small smile on his face. He stopped a few meters away, saying simply, “Theta.”

“Beta!” the Doctor cheered, lunging forward to hug the man, who caught him and swung him around, a true smile finally on his face. “It is _good_ to see you old friend. Suppose tea is out though, given what’s happened to the old homestead?” the Doctor asked, raising an eyebrow in the direction of the shelled house.

“The old chapel is still in good shape,” the man replied, “But tea is a bit out of the question at home, yes.”

“Well let’s just hop on over there!” the Doctor beamed, hooking his arm around the other man’s, his jaunty expression and lively signature outfit a sharp contrast to this Beta’s dark blue and black wardrobe, sunglasses put away to reveal severe blue eyes.

“Introductions first, Theta,” he chided, and the Doctor grinned at Amy and Rory, who were watching with undisguised interest. “Mrs. Amelia Williams, and Mr. Rory Williams, my Companions, this is Beta, a very old friend.”

Rory was staring at him blatantly, a curious expression on his face. Beta was returning the examination, but neither of them said anything despite Amy and the Doctor’s nudges, Beta instead continuing, “Well let us head over to the chapel then, if there are no objections. There are some basic tea supplies, nothing fancy I’m afraid.”

“Oh that’s quite all right,” Amy assured him, tugging Rory after so they were walking arm-in-arm next to the other duo towards the chapel they could see in the distance across the heather. “May I ask what happened? It must have been a truly beautiful home,” she said, casting a wistful glance over her shoulder at the burnt wreck.

“It was a mausoleum,” Beta said shortly, “Home of nothing but death and decay. A fitting end to it, what happened.”

“What _did_ happen, Beta?” the Doctor asked after Amy subsided in shock at the brusque response.

“A recent enemy didn’t realize just who he was against,” Beta snorted, “Reasonably skilled, but with a tendency towards monologues. He is dead, now.”

“Beta,” the Doctor chided, clearly understanding just _how_ the man had died. No matter what it might say on paper, he knew that when Beta said that, the man was dead at his hands and very personally so.

“He killed Margaret, Theta. My Margaret, died in my arms by him,” Beta looked down at the shorter man coldly, who could only close his eyes and sigh slightly in grief. “My apologies, and condolences, Beta. She was a sweet child.”

“Your daughter?” Rory asked quietly, “How old?”

“Near sixty,” Beta replied, voice clipped and precise, but the Doctor’s low groan, “Still an _infant_ ,” was echoed in Beta’s tightening jaw.

“Under a chameleon?” the Doctor asked sadly.

“We were going to retire on her sixtieth and travel,” Beta said, sadness finally almost discernible in his tone, “We were short two months. Two bloody months.”

The Doctor stopped him short of opening the chapel doors to wrap his arms around him another hug, Beta easily returning it this time. Amy and Rory quietly continued into the chapel, leaving the duo to their grief for the moment. Amy was looking around curiously, pointing out details to Rory and turning to find him with his gaze locked on a pair of stains in the flagstone near the altar.

“Rory?” she asked quietly, “Are those?”

“Yes,” he said calmly, stepping forward and crouching down for a closer look. “Both fatal. Slow bleeding on this one, probably a gut shot, this one was fast – not as much blood though, so I’d guess either stopped bullet or knife, a through-and-through wound would produce more.”

“You’re quite good,” Beta’s voice interrupted his logic, Rory rising to his feet and stammering, “Ah – apologies, Beta I just – “

The other man shook his head, interrupting, “No need. It is interesting to get a measure of who travels with Theta this time around. You were right, both counts. The gut shot was Margaret, the knife was the foolish bastard who dared.”

Amy was watching the pair curiously and leaned in towards Rory when the duo walked by, still arm-in-arm, to the sacristy, presumably to get things for tea. “You don’t suppose?” she asked, raising an eyebrow meaningfully.

Rory blinked, before looking after them, “With River?” he asked, torn between being angry at the idea, and being indifferent. He and River had missed so much time, he hardly felt a father.

“With Melody, yes,” Amy corrected with a squeeze of his hand. “But not quite, I mean, he did say old friend, right? Quite possible it’s before.”

“I don’t know Amy, don’t strike me as the type,” Rory shrugged, before admitting at Amy’s sharp look, “But I’ve been wrong, not like it’s our business anyway, Amy.”

“Only you, Theta, could marry a Companion’s daughter when you had changed her _diapers_ ,” Beta sounded clearly amused as the two of them came back into the main chapel, the Doctor carrying tins of biscuits and a small folding table while Beta had a tray with an already steaming pot of tea and mugs.

“Hope you don’t mind Earl Grey,” he said, setting the tray down on the table before draping himself onto some pews, the Doctor dropping next to him still protectively holding the biscuit tins.

“Quite all right!” Amy chirped, sitting down on the pew in front of them and grabbing her cup and some sugars, twisting around so she was able to look over the back at them easily. Rory joined her, sitting tailor style at her feet and simply bracing his wrists on the back of the pew, leaning forward a bit so he could drink his tea without losing his balance.

“So when are you two from?” Beta asked after a sip of tea.

“Twenty-first century, 2009 actually,” Amy smiled, “Though I first met the Doctor when I was just a girl, in 1994. He said he’d be back in a few minutes and was gone 15 years.”

“The little girl who fed me custard and fish-sticks all grown up and a kiss-o-gram!” the Doctor pouted, Beta looking at him sideways and saying warily, “Fish-sticks and custard?”

“Delicious!” the Doctor promised, “You’ll have to come to see the old girl and have some, it’s lovely.”

“To each their own, I suppose,” Beta replied with a slight smile, “My tastes haven’t changed much, life-to-life, not like yours. I remember you hating bow-ties,” he tugged at the offending tie fondly.

“Yes well not all of us are as set in our ways as you,” the Doctor teased, swatting at his hand. “Same name, same job, same drink and same girls!”

“Oh never the same girls,” Beta smiled truly this time, a wicked thing that spoke of some good times. “Hardly the same one more than once, you know me better Theta.”

“Cad,” the Doctor snorted, no heat in his tone.

“Prude,” he teased back, “Unless it’s old Bess I suppose. Do you know how upset Margaret was to find you’d deflowered her hero? Really, Theta. What a disgraceful uncle you were.”

“I was married, each time!” the Doctor insisted, “Married! Not each Companion – though Jack was definitely trying the fiend,” he mumbled.

“Ah, Jack. Good times. Did I ever thank you for introducing us?” Beta honestly grinned at the Doctor’s theatrical wail, “I can’t believe I ever did that! What was I thinking?”

“You weren’t, you were completely smashed,” Beta replied cheerfully, the stoic man they had met finally relaxing into someone they could see their Doctor honestly befriending. It was a bit of a relief to watch them snipe back and forth at each other.

“Wait, each _Companion_?” Amy asked, before smirking at Rory, “I _told_ you it sounded dirty!”

“Oh don’t use Beta as an example! He gets a new one every job, much less every life!” the Doctor groaned, “They’re not even _Companions_ , he doesn’t choose them to help out, or to travel and have fun with, he just finds these women who want to have sex with him.”

“I can’t help it, I’m irresistible,” he smiled charmingly, “Certainly helps I never have to worry about leaving children behind unless I want to.”

“That’s bloody useful,” Rory mumbled, Amy swatting at him in response.

“Well, with human women,” Beta corrected, “The difference in genetics is enough any sort of reproduction has to be carefully arranged.”

“So are you a Time Lord then?” Amy asked, “And how do you know the Doctor here?”

“Oh we grew up together,” Beta smiled, “There were a few others, but Theta here was the only one that kept in touch when I left.”

“Why’d you leave? Was it like the Doctor?” Amy asked curiously.

“They drove my brother mad for their own ends, I couldn’t stay with them, nor could I go with my brother,” Beta shrugged, previous animation fading back into stoicism at the direction of inquiry. “So Theta helped me get away, and we’ve been meeting up on the anniversary ever since.”

“Doctor, could I have a biscuit, or will you be hoarding them all?” Rory asked, trying to change the topic and succeeding, the Doctor pouting as he offered an open tin, Amy and Beta chuckling at his expression.

“You’ve already had half the tin, sugar fiend,” Beta chided, setting his now empty cup aside.

The Doctor glared at him half-heartedly, before nodding at Rory and Amy’s now empty cups and saying, “Would you two mind exploring a bit and letting us catch up?”

“Not at all!” Amy smiled, jumping to her feet and dragging Rory with her. “Just give a shout when you’re ready to go, anything we need to watch out for?”

“All the bombs were cleared, but I’d be careful if you went wandering in the house, it’s not stable any longer,” Beta replied, and the two of them nodded before heading out, leaving the two Time Lords to exchange news and mourn the loss of one of theirs.

It was a few hours before they left, Amy and Rory enjoying their _completely peaceful_ tramp around the countryside and the two Time Lords remaining in the chapel, working their way through all the biscuits as they caught up.

They gathered in front of the TARDIS again, Beta waving off invitations to join them with a small smile, “No, no, I’m afraid I’d best be off. Funerals to attend, missions to run, gadget builders to pester into greater things. And Theta is _always_ late.”

“Oh come on!” the Doctor whined, “Am not! A Time Lord is never late!”

“You just quoted Gandalf, which does not count,” Beta chided, smiling at Amy and kissing the back of her hand, “Pleasure to meet you Mrs. Williams, a shame I missed my chance.”

Amy, even knowing he was a flirt and not one to settle, blushed. Rory just rolled his eyes, a small smile on his face as he watched her; she was amazing, and she’d agreed to be with _him_ forever. He always counted himself lucky.

“Centurion,” the Time Lord said, Rory turning to look at Beta and smiling slightly, “So you were there,” he said vaguely.

The Time Lord smiled, “Yes, quite. She was indeed worth it, I see.”

“Always,” Rory said placidly, returning the man’s firm handshake and nod. Amy wrapped her arm around his waist and kissed his cheek, Rory smiling at her while Beta moved on to the Doctor, who was looking, well, droopy for lack of a better word.

“You _sure_ you can’t travel with us?” the Doctor asked again, Beta just smiling slightly and pulling him into a rough hug, “I’m certain, Theta. Come ask me again, when Margaret’s been in the ground a while longer. I need to remember why I like it here first, or I might fall.”

The Doctor shuddered, Amy and Rory wondering what it was they were referring to, though they could guess. “Very well,” the Doctor agreed, pulling back reluctantly, “You take care of yourself, Beta.”

“And you, yourself, Theta. I’m the one with the job that pays me to nearly die, yet you’re further in regenerations. I think I should be more worried about you,” he smiled slightly, stepping back to lean against his car. “See you later, you three.”

“Goodbye, Beta,” Amy smiled. “Pleasure to meet you again,” Rory echoed as they headed into the TARDIS.

The two Time Lords stared at each other a while longer, before Beta smiled, whispering, “Go, Theta. I will be fine.”

“You’d better,” the Doctor declared. “Five years, same place? You going to fix it up?”

“I suppose I must, I’ve owned it for decades now,” Beta sighed, nodding, “Five years, same place. As usual Theta. Now go. A mutli-verse awaits.”

“And whenever you’re ready to travel it again, just let me know,” the Doctor beamed. “It’d be nice to travel together again.”

“It would,” Beta acknowledged as the Doctor walked into the TARDIS, “It really would.”

The Doctor gave one last wave before the door shut and the whirr-screech of the TARDIS activating echoed in the Highlands before it vanished, leaving the Britain-bound Time Lord to the wind-rushed heather and an old, crumbling home.

Meanwhile, a few centuries sideways and diagonally backwards, the Williams’ and the Doctor were heading to their next destination, Amy asking curiously, “So is his Time Lord name Beta? Or does he have one like The Doctor?”

“Oh he has one,” the Doctor flashed a crooked smile over at the pair as he fiddled with dials again. “He’s The Agent.”

James Bond ran his hand over his girl, his faithful old TARDIS, before sliding into the driver seat and punching it. He was due back in London for a meeting with M in two hours. Impossible to make by car, no matter how good an agent was driving.

He smiled, and gave the key an extra twist. Good thing he wasn’t any agent.


End file.
